A Gift of Joy on a Shelf of Journals

Friends, let's share stories of joy today. 

Let us never grow weary of sharing God's gifts and God's grace in our lives.

Let us always share prayers but, please, may we always share praises too. 

Are you with me? Ready to share encouragement, to share God-moments? 

Okay, I will go first...

God didn't lead me through any long lessons today, 

just rest,

just renewal, 

just reminders.

I happen to be writing quite a bit lately and I am writing my favorite pens right out of ink and my first ever journal right out of pages. I can now say I've written an entire book, unedited that is, but a collection of sorts, of short stories, of my stories. 

Lives keep running on even when pages run out so...this morning I went on a very special shopping trip. I went browsing the bookstore for the just-right journal.

Well God gave journals, yes, but even better than that, God gave scripture that spoke right to my heart. For some, these verses will be of great encouragement. For others, you will understand the impact this succession of scripture had on me.

I took these photos in chronological order as the verses were gifted to me.

This is how it happened:

I opened each of the following journals to just one random page to see if it would suit my preferences for writing...

 Psalm 27:1.4-5

 And again, Psalm 27:4 

 Psalm 30:5

 Psalm 46:10

On the left page- Psalm 27:1 (Again!)

And on the right- Deuteronomy 31:8

 Nehemiah 8:10

 The message gets clear as He gives the verse so intricately woven with my salvation,

These pages aren't so random, they are so God

 Isaiah 40:31

 Psalm 30:5

Right off the bottom page of this journal,

"If joy really does come in the morning, then there's no better place to start the day."

Every morning, every journal, every page, every praise.

All to the glory of God.

"And now abide faith, hope, love, these three: but the greatest of these is love." 

1 Corinthians 13:13

P.S. I bought three.

Seeds of Service

The sky was still dark when I pressed brew in sleepy anticipation for the first sip of my new dark roast blend of coffee. 

Reaching for the mug, it caught my eye, the newest addition to my morning routine. Sitting on the counter, side by side, are the two aromas that wake me to the beauty of each new day. On the right, a tall and sturdy coffee pot and by its side, a small daily devotional that reminds me just how big my God really is. 

I reach out and flip to the next page, the start of a new day, the seed of a new lesson being planted in my heart. A lesson I don't recognize until it begins to bloom in my everyday life. 

The cinnamon swirls on the surface as I take my first sip of coffee. And the verse? Well it's stirring too. Swirling around the mind, brewing thoughts. God's word awakening me to a life lived in Him. 

So that little page shouts big truths. In script it says,

Let's scatter a few seeds today and watch what happens.

"This is what the kingdom of God is like. A man scatters seed on the ground. Night and day, whether he sleeps or gets up, the seed sprouts and grows, though he does not know how." -Mark 4:26 

As I sink into the couch for a few minutes of cozy reading before the day gets loco-crazy, I think about how planting seeds in Gods' kingdom must mean telling souls about Jesus. 

Well yes, feeding souls with scripture is one method of planting seeds, but God had a different lesson plan in mind; a message for me that was less about telling and more about showing; less about what I know and more about humbling low. 

So what's another method of planting the seeds for His kingdom crop?

Feeding souls with service.

He is teaching me how to plant seeds of service.

The words are straight forward and they challenge me straight to the core. 

"For though I am free from all men, I have made myself a servant to all, that I might win the more; and to the Jews I became as a Jew, that I might win the Jews...to the weak I became as weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all men, that I might by all means save some. Now this I do for the Gospel's sake..." - 1 Corinthians 9:19-23 (NKJV)

Even Paul, he says it right there, that he is a servant for the Gospel's sake. 

And just one chapter over, God challenges me yet again to make my actions bring glory to Him and not to myself. I'm finding that the door out of selfishness is the very same passage that leads us to serve. 

"Let no one seek his own, but each one the other's well-being." - 1 Corinthians 10:24

A few days before this verse hit the heart, I had prayed for opportunities. Father God, please can you put in my pathway opportunities to serve those around me. Lord help me to lay aside myself and take up my cross. 

As the perfect teacher, he gave the lesson before he gave the answer to my prayer.

Gabrielle, plant the seeds in My Kingdom with your service to others. 

If this answered prayer could be measured in cups of coffee, I would tell you that I'm extremely thankful for my new, strong dark roast. 

I asked, and my good God provided.

It's a lesson 10 days in the making but the Lord doesn't tire of asking me to serve and so I thank Him that He never tires of serving me hefty helpings of His heavenly strength.  

In each of these, the Lord asks me the same question. My child, will you serve?

It is the Lord who asks for my heart in each scenario and it is the Lord I must answer to. Sometimes it is hard to say yes, but I find that the more of me I give away, the more strength the Lord gives to me in return. 

Planting seeds of service doesn't always plant the words of the Gospel but it plants the love of Christ and this I do for the Gospel's sake (1 Corinthians 9:19-23) 

I've given hugs and given hours and given explanations and I have seen that service leads to curiosity for my motivation to give, and for that, I am ready to give an answer. 

It is not of my own strength that I give. It's hard to let go of myself. It's hard, and it hurts, and it humbles, and this world asks a lot of me and do I really have enough for others when I might not have enough for myself? This is what God is breaking me of--myself. That's why discipleship is the process of discipline; Sanding the rough surface of selfishness right off my heart.

Throughout this whole journey, I am flipping pages with Much-Afraid, the main character in the beautifully written novel, Hind's Feet on High Places, an allegory dramatizing the yearning of God's children to be led to new heights of love, joy, and victory. 

It is here I find a poetic reminder that there is joy in planting with service. 

"This the deepest law we know-

It is happy to go low.

"This is the law by which we live-

It is so sweet to give and give.

"This is the joy of all winged life above-

Happy it is to be able to love. 

-Hannah Hurnard 

Last night, I was munching on some sunflower seeds and thinking about all the seeds God has asked me to plant this last week. 

Because he knows I'm flawed with pride, he leaves me with this healthy reminder that my work is not for my gain but for His glory.

"So then neither he who plants is anything, nor he who waters, but God who gives the increase." -1 Corinthians 3:7 

A Calling to Prayer in the Secret Place

I heard it first on a Sunday. 

With seats filled full with people and ceilings filled high with praise, the pastor settled into the book of Matthew, chapter six, and began to preach on prayer. 

Prayer, something familiar to me. Only this time the lesson was different, unexpected, a new angle of approach.

On this Sunday, I soaked in a sermon that was not about what we say, but how we pray. 

At one point I wrestled with pride, concerned about praying with fancy words and fluid thoughts and sounding to others as if I always had powerful prayers, perfect prayers. 

No fancy words here; just me, just Jesus. Just a heart spilling out simple words and mashed up, juxtaposed thoughts. Spilling out for the filling up. I spill messy prayers, and He fills with beauty.  

On this Sunday, it is a different lesson.

And what does Jesus say about how we ought to pray?

"But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly." -Matthew 6:6

So the sermon circles around this particular verse and for the next few days, my thoughts circle around it too. With each reflective thought, I realize my prayer life is not a reflection of the way Jesus is calling me to pray. 

What do my prayers look like? 

Too often, I talk to my Father on the go. Like my prayers are puzzle pieces I try to fit into my daily picture. Getting ready for the day, on the way to school, at work. And are these really prayers? 

It is sad to admit, but really they look more like side notes to God.

My heart breaks because I think maybe I'm treating God like I treat the rest of my to-dos. I think that my "prayers" are more like sticky notes to God that I scribble in the business of my day. And how silly of me to write sticky-note, after-thought prayers to a God to remind Him how much I need help every day. This He already knows. 

My "prayers" look too much like sticky notes in passing and not enough like undivided devotion and communion with God. 

I heard it first on a Sunday, but the echo of truth reverberated off the walls of a reflecting heart and repeated itself in a song, in a psalm. 

"He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty." -Psalm 91:1 

It is now the middle of the week and I find myself humming this verse as a soft tune while tackling my chores. One moment, it is a repeating song, and the next, my heart stops because I hear it this time. Again, repetition gets my attention: secret place. 

I sit down and grab my Bible and frantically flip for my notes on that sermon on how we are called to pray in the secret place. My heart races with curiosity. The thrill of the hunt. 

There it is, right there. 

In Matthew 6:6, Jesus tells us that our Father "...who is in the secret place..." answers our prayers, but that we must seek Him in the secret place. 

Psalm 91:1 says that whoever dwells--spends time in, lives life in-- the secret place with God, will abide--to remain, reside--in the shadow of the Almighty. 

My thoughts jump back years to the evenings I spent with my siblings in the driveway, drawing chalk people by tracing our shadows on the pavement. My shadow was always close by. Shadows are always close to their creator, always near to their owner. 

I smile happy because it hits me here, the realization that if I dwell in the secret place with my Father, I will abide, reside, in His shadow. I will always be near to Him. 

As if these two verses weren't enough food for the soul, He keeps on giving.  

The Lord calls for me again and again, relentless singing through the same psalm, His invitation to the secret places and a deeper communion with Him. 

"For in the time of trouble, He shall hide me in His pavilion; in the secret place of His tabernacle He shall hide me; He shall set me high upon a rock." -Psalm 27:5

Not only will I find God if I pray to Him in the secret place;

(Matthew 6:6)

Not only will I abide in His shadow if I spend time in the secret place;

(Psalm 91:1)

God will hide me in His secret place when troubles come.

(Psalm 27:5)

So, yes. I heard it first on a Sunday, but it took some days to soak into the heart. 

This here, this is my calling to meet my Father in prayer in the secret place. 

A few days later, the Lord feeds me again, continually on the hunt.

"O my dove, in the clefts of the rock, in the secret places of the cliff, let me see your face, let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet, and your face is lovely." -Song of Solomon 2:14

There really is nothing sweeter than the heart calling truth of the Lord. His calling for communion with Him.

My thoughts circle back to Psalm 27--this psalm has been my home--and my heart echos this verse with it's greatest desire,

"One thing I have desired of the Lord, that will I seek; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life..." -Psalm 27:4 

He is calling me to meet Him in the secret place. 

Is the Father calling you too? 

The Fear of the Lord: Abba Father

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life." -John 3:16 

"But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name." -John 1:12

Is it possible to be entirely lost and yet overwhelmingly rescued at the very same time?

And how do I form an adult explanation when I feel so shrinkingly sure I'm a child?

It is all a blur and the blur feels like pure joy and looks like playground spinning. Like two cheerful children, hands held tight with trusting embrace, spinning around and around. In the very same instant, they coexist; this child-like joy and unfailing trust that spring up in the spinning of life blurring by. 

They circle around a center and in the center, in the bulls-eye of confusion, is joy, clarity.

"The way out of confusion is to concentrate: circle around Christ. Simplicity isn't a matter of circumstances, it's a matter of focus." - Ann Voskamp

They trust the one holding them and in these hands are safety. 

I trust the only One who holds me upright in all these spinning storms and find truth; there is safety in the Savior. 

At times I wonder where all these childlike analogies come from. Why are my third-year-in-college thoughts so third grade at times? 

God is in the business of teaching through storms and in the spinning I'm shrinking because He knows the smaller I am, the larger He is. When I come crawling, He comforts and I calm; He swells and I shrink. 

The Lord makes sense of my elementary mind when my elementary mind makes sense of the fact that He is LORD. In this moment I meditate on His very name and remember that in every way, I AM is greater than i am.  

He is Father and I am child.  

This alone convicts a heart that teeters toward self-centered instead of Christ-centered. 

I come crawling to the Father for comfort in the storms of confusion and yet I wander in my own will the moment I lose sight of the Savior, the Son; The Son who the Father sent to pay my adoption fee. God sent His only begotten Son so that I could be purchased and redeemed and renamed as a child of the One True King. 

"For you are all children of God through faith in Christ Jesus." -Galatians 3:26

Through the greatest act of love in history, the Father sacrificed His very Son because He loves me enough to call me His daughter. 

Many thoughts spin concentric circles around a central idea. 

This lesson is a gift that I'm unwrapping, tearing open one verse at a time. 

There isn't much I can see but I can read the gift tag, From: God, To: Gabrielle, an impression like script on my heart with promises of scripture to come. 

But before the reveal comes this reminder; merely review, because my soul needs refreshing and my heart needs reminding that my very identity is found in the love of the Lord. That God didn't adopt me to hold me at a distance, but instead to draw me into an intimate relationship with Himself. I crawl to Him and I call to Him, Abba Father. 

Abba Father- "Daddy". 

In search of a deeper understanding of this deep love of the Father, I found this: 

"In scripture there are many different names used to describe God. While all the names of God are important in many ways, the name "Abba Father" is one of the most significant names of God in understanding how He relates to people. The word Abba is an Aramaic word that would most closely be translated as "Daddy." It was a common term that young children would use to address their fathers. It signifies the close, intimate relationship of a father to his child, as well as the childlike trust that a young child puts in his "daddy." 

Read more of the article here: What does it mean that God is our Abba Father? 

I am reminded that He is the Parent and I am the child.

He knows what lies ahead in this marathon trial and I'm still bent low, struggling to wind the rabbit ears of shoes laces in circles to tie up my shoe souls--or my real soul?-- for the race. In circling shoe laces I'm reminding myself to circle around Christ because He is the sure and safe knot that will hold secure when my footfalls land in unsteady places. 

Humbled in having to ask my Father, Abba Father, Daddy, will you tie my shoes? Will you give me strength? Will you hold my hand? Will you run with me always? 

"The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." -Deuteronomy 31:8 

I leave the start line and, with each step, I unwrap a little more of this God given gift.

The Father goes before me to show me wisdom,
just as His Son went before me to show me the way. 

"The secret of the Lord is with those who fear Him..." -Psalm 25:14

My Abba Father lays out scripture like a cheerio-trail before me. 

A verse.

and another step...

A verse.

and another step...and one cheerio of truth after the next, I eat of the wisdom of His word and my nourishment comes from the knowledge that my Father places in front of me. 

He is the Leader and I am the learner. I pick up each cheerio-verse and the circles in my childlike analogies remind me to circle around Christ. 

I give thanks for his never ending faithfulness to teach me and to love me and to call me His child. Each verse is another clue to my searching heart, my seeking question: Father, teach me what it means to fear You. 

I'm still unwrapping but this much I know. This "Abba" intimacy between God and His children is intimately woven with understanding the fear of the Father. 

He is so faithful. 

His trail of scripture is never ending and I follow it in search of the secret.

"The secret of the Lord is with those who fear Him..." -Psalm 25:14

The Fear of the Lord: When I'm Running from the King

Despite popular belief, I have a tendency to procrastinate.

Yes, even me. 

My early essay-drafting, constant agenda-planning, list-making, food-prepping, reminder-setting ways are all weak attempts to fight my very fleshly tendency towards procrastination.

I like to trick myself and call it productive procrastinating, you know the kind. The rationale of pushing things off where you accomplish every minute chore--down to reorganizing your closet and rearranging your living room--before you submit and sit to attack the only thing that actually desperately demands your attention. 

You'll understand if you're tricking yourself too. 

For years I have struggled to discipline myself, wrestled to counteract my own ways. As is the case in many areas, I've been desperately failing. 

Until now, my procrastination has yielded little in the way of harmful repercussions. The list of needs-to-get-done seems to always get done. 

Months ago, when the skies of spring had rained and the sun now reigned over the summer season, the Son who reigns called out to me.

Gabrielle, do you know what it means to fear our Father?

My soul responded in reluctant whispers; Well, no. This I know,

"And we have known and believed the love that God has for us. God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him." - 1 John 4:16 

...God is love. Why would I fear my God. He is love. 

In my lack of understanding, I choose to chip away at the multitude of tasks that demand my immediate attention, and I brush aside studying for the spiritual test. Semesters go by reading chapter after chapter of textbooks instead of impressing on the heart the only text that matters from the very book that is the Word of Life. 

Again and again, like the relentless reminder of an alarm clock blaring snooze, the Spirit tries to wake me to a glimpse of light. 

In my flesh I am weak and my weeks slide by in selfish procrastination. Pushing off the very teachings of the Lord. 

There I was. The perfect embodiment of haughtiness, running away from responsibility. Me, with a false sense of strength. In my world. Caught up in my own fleshly procrastination.

Until now. 

Here I am. The perfect embodiment of brokenness, running to be rescued. Me, in a desperate hour with no strength at all. In a world I can't comprehend. Caught up in His infinite embrace. 

It is in this that I finally hear my Father's relentless calling for my attention. Gabrielle, do you understanding what it means to fear Me? 

No, Father. I am scared; teach me to fear You. 

My heart cries, an echo of Psalm 27,

"When You said, 'Seek My face.' My heart said to You, 'Your face, LORD, I will seek." -Psalm 27:8

And in these sinking moments, scripture sounds reassurance through my searching soul. 

"Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart." -Jeremiah 29:12-13

Again, I fall in the flesh and surrender in all my mess of procrastination to the Lord saying, Your face, LORD, I will seek. 

He is so faithful. 

As I sit in the afternoon breeze, this verse hits me like a mighty wind, and in some tiny sinew of my sinful flesh, I know. 

I know this is a blessing.

A blessing I could only begin to receive when I began to repent.

I have run with fear of not understanding; and the fear of the Lord is precisely what I was not understanding. 

With a deep breath, I breathe God in. 

"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom." -Psalm 111:10

Lord, I need wisdom.

And in scripture he repeats it to me because repetition is discipline and the Lord disciplines those he loves. 

"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding." - Proverbs 9:10 

Yes Lord, I need understanding too.

I find myself here, once again, wrestling to discipline my flesh.

In studying the fear of the LORD, I  submit to discipline against procrastination with prayers that I may be transformed into a disciple of proclamation. Lord, let my life be a proclamation of Your holiness.

"Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised." -Psalm 48:1

I See the Piece but God See's the Puzzle

There I sit, right foot firmly on the brake peddle; left arm cranking circles as the window lowers slowly; right hand feeling frantically for that plastic card, you know the one- the one with the string of magical numbers of purchasing power and magnetic wonder- that gets shop-a-holics in trouble and shops-a-nevers like me rarely swipe for fear of losing track, losing margins, losing safety. 

And maybe I'd have a better chance of holding tightly to safety if the Mazda were in park. 

It was one of those moments when the storm clouds of the Florida afternoon were hovering heavy-low, rain drops swelling large with the humid air. It seemed silly but the clearance height on the drive through ATM probably made no difference because the sky was pressing so low, so strong, that its weight demanded, you may come this far and no further. 

I find the card and wiggle it gently out of the wallet. I think of how, in the last 10 weeks, I have been led--to and away--from two jobs. I think of how bills are consistent even when paychecks aren't. I think of how we worry worry worry when we place security in material storehouses and how many moments I've struggled and found myself guilty of just that. 

I think about how God must see me as a floundering child when I breath a little faster and hold a little tighter because my financial security seems fleeting. And it is. I think of how He pressed on my heart that first time I gave my written notice; My dear child, your work here is done. Go and walk, I have plans for a hope and a future. 

I think of how humbling-hard it is to walk where feet may fail and how much rock-solid-joy floods in knowing that my God will never fail. 

And for a while I walk and His Word keeps me strong with reminders of a heavenly security. 

"Do not lay up for yourself treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven...For where your treasure is, there your heart will also be." - Matthew 6:19-21 NKJV

"Therefore, do not worry saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?'...For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added to you." -Matthew 6:31-33

So with sometimes shaky steps I make my way through the summer semesters assignments and I thank God for the time to get my work done and I trust Him for provision.

Then one afternoon I get a call back, a new number, an opportunity. 

Two interviews gone well and a sense of peace that this could be the right direction, a link to the future. Maybe a calling I had never allowed my thoughts to entertain before, not even a toe dipped in the shallow end. I am so weak, so set, so scheduled; Oh how I struggle to break my planning personality of needing to know what comes next and accept that God knows, not me. 

It is He who has a plan for me, for hope, for a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)

It is I who must walk by faith and not by sight. (2 Corinthians 5:7) 

It has been a trust-challenge; to walk with a blindfold knowing that God still sees. And so I walked.

I walked through training and I walked through classrooms and I walked through naming shapes and colors as if it were the most fascinating afternoon craft project that had ever been done with torn up pieces of tri-colored construction paper. And when you're three, it doesn't get much better than that.

I rocked babies to sleep and read books to children who knew the stories better than I know how to spell my own name but still got giddy-excited with each page turn as if each new picture, each new line of words spelled out an even better adventure. 

Maybe they're the ones that really have it right after all. Excited for what lies ahead. 

The one book, with the animals in the woods, now that was a four year old thriller. I remember the big brown bear that all the animals hid from, hid because it looked huge and scary and uncertain, and really that bear gave cuddly hugs and brought more joy than running away could have ever brought safety. 

Maybe that's how I look at life sometimes. Big and scary and uncertain, because unknown is scary. And I think of how those four-year-old children held their breath, eyes wide and grinning with excitement for the turn of a new page. 

Childlike curiosity for adventure. Refreshing. 

So I walked through teacher training and I think maybe it was actually the children who were teaching me; about life and adventure and wide-eyed grinning excitement for whatever dancing line of 5-word narration came on the next page. 

Humbling. 

I soak it in and sigh with relief. He is the Narrator of my story, and if 5 words is all I get, just enough direction for this moment, this next step, this day, this page, His gifts of just-enough-light for one sure footfall are more-than-enough-guidance for me. God is sufficient. 

And then it happened again. That heart-pressing and spirit-guiding that brought me low in all my pride before a God who knows the future and leads the blind by faith. My dear child, the mission I have for you is not here. 

Then it hits me hard. The reality that no matter how hard I work, how much I give, how long I strive, my work is in vain if it's not in His will. No amount of my hard work in the wrong direction will ever budge God's will for the right direction.  

For the second time in 10 weeks I give my notice and I pray pray pray for grace and understanding in this uncomfortable whirlwind of mistakes admitted. And I walk.

Which leads me to this moment of extreme multitasking. Where clouds hang heavy and lists string long with to-dos, and God teaches patience, preparing the rain. 

On my way from one assignment to tackle the list of homework running through my weekly agenda, I find myself juggling the chaos of a now routine visit to the ATM. In the midst of my circus act, my purse starts singing and buzzing with the vibrate of a ringing phone I still haven't figured out how to answer without hanging up about 2.7 seconds later. 

Touch screen technology. How you complicate and frustrate my longing for a simple life. 

The screen displays an unknown number; I think to myself, well what's one more unknown and I slide the bar and hold it to my ear with an unsure hello.

A greeting and then... a gift. 

"So I hear you are a math tutor."

And in our conversation, it's like the flood gates of heaven opened. Only this time I'm swept away in the waters of God-gifts and God's grace and not the pelting raindrops that spew storms of the world. 

On the very same day, in the very same hour I am racing-rushed to deliver yet another letter of resignation, I'm caught in the chaos by a gift of provision; A gift of God. 

Math tutor-a glimmer of hope that my steps are heading in the right direction of,
Math teacher-a possible future. 

Over the last year I've seen that when pieces fall into the right position, it's because God knows the bigger picture. He is the Puzzle Maker, but I must hold hands open wide to receive, with thanksgiving, each piece that is masterfully placed. 

The heavy storms that pounded that Florida afternoon left the ATM broken and my hands without material provision. As is always the case, my moment of reliance on a worldly storehouse of security had left me empty handed. With a whirlwind of grace, God rained gifts of heavenly opportunity from a storehouse not of this world, that gave provision far more than enough for me. 

"Do not lay up for yourself treasures on earth...For where your treasure is, there your heart will also be." 

On How You Can't Outgrow Growing Pains

Because change is a lot for the heart to absorb.

This month, I'm standing in awe, arms opening wide to soak it all in.

My thoughts are spinning. 

Out of the corner of my eye, I catch a glimpse of the beauty of life blooming, color spilling joy into this moment. Looking at the sunshine yellow flowers, I pause to inhale the calm of creation. 

As much as technology can be frustrating to me, for just a moment, my scrambling mind entertains the thought, wonders at the possibilities. 

I linger one thought longer, glancing across the room at the television as it sits heavy by the delicate flowers. For the first time, I notice a sharp contrast between the man-made flat screen that holds moments of time, and the God-breathed beauty that can momentarily slow lives in an attempt to capture creation. 

If only I could DVR these few weeks of my life. Hit pause and slow down and soak up all the waves of life change. Just wade calmly in each moment of friends moving and lives shifting and adventures starting.

In my attempt to soak in, I long to slow down and hug tight until I'm ready for them to go. Laugh long until we've stored up enough joy to merry our souls until we meet again. 

Sometimes I think it might be nice to hit rewind and just dance in that last hour of excitement and anticipation for life's next adventure, just suspend time in one moment before hitting play to experience the next. 

But the truth is, life moves and changes come--sometimes all at the same time--and although there is a man-made solution to alleviate nearly every discomfort, there is no remote control to freeze time when life change comes. 

I used to think that growing up meant growing pains were a thing of the past. 
I suppose I'm not grown up yet.

Lives changing means hearts widening; People moving means arms stretching; Adventure taking means prayers expanding.

And all of these are growing pains for the soul.

No pause button here. Just God. Just faith. Just love in the midst of transition and support in the times of trial.

And although sometimes I'd like to hit pause for just a moment, I ride the roller coaster of change that is my life in full motion. 

I sit still, power out,  in the realization that while DVR captures lives, no man-made remote could ever control hearts like the Father. It is God who gives beauty in the midst of chaos and sends gifts of comfort that slow souls and help soak up these precious moments. It is the beauty of God's creation and provision in our lives that gives rest in rapid change.

And with another glance, I see fragile flowers standing tall and speaking beauty and pressing pause for at least this moment. 

In His word, I find alleviation for the growing pains of life. 

"Be still and know that I am God." -Psalm 46:10 

Launched for the Lord

It all began with prayer.

Prayers of thanksgiving for the opportunity to serve. Prayers for God's truth breathing and heart healing to pour over struggles and lift up spirits and launch out students in His name. Prayers to renew a group of thirsty souls. 

Prayers for the mission that God had for us in the week to come.

"Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us..." - Ephesians 3:20

Resting with faith on His promises to accomplish the impossible, the love of Christ did nothing less than launch this group on mission for God. With hands lifted high in praise and linked strong in prayer, we were united. 

It spread through souls like wildfire. Revival. 

There were hearts hearing and minds seeing, eyes opening and lives growing closer, drawn together by the blood of Christ; the very blood that gives love and gives life became fuel to launch the next generation. 

And as the perfect Father, God overwhelmed us with certainty that in His Word, we would find the guidance needed to face the world.

Every day was a gift to watch. 

I smile at the memory of morning devotions where tired eyes read life into awakening souls. Campers, leaders, speakers, singers, all students of the King, soaking in wisdom through His Word. 

A realization that provision proceeds the mission:

"All scripture is breathed out by God and as profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work." - 2 Timothy:16-17

A warning to be rooted in truth and strong in the Savior:

"See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ."- Colossians 2:8 

"And you are complete in Him, who is the head of all principality and power." -Colossians 2:10
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A reminder that to launch is to live out our ministry:

"Preach the word! Be ready in season and out of season...for the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine...they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables. But you be watchful in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry." -2 Timothy 2-5

An encouraging truth that we wear the armor of God:

"Therefore, take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day..." - Ephesians 6:13

A call to lift off:

"Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations..." -Matthew 28:19

God's love launched lives. And the sleep deprived were revived with hope and strength in the Lord.